6 Ways to Help a Male Caregiver

Male caregivers? Doesn't most caregiving in a family fall on the women? Aren't they the ones who coordinate care, or provide the day-to-day support for ailing loved ones?

Traditionally, yes, but in a survey reported in the October/November issue of AARP, a full 40% of family caregivers are men. 50% of all family caregivers work full-time. Chances are you know a friend, co-worker, or family member who leads in the hard work of making sure their parent, spouse, or adult child is well-cared for.

But men do not traditionally have a social network of support and tend to labor alone.
Here are 6 ways you can support and encourage a male caregiver.

1. Be a Buddy.

Day-to-day caregiving can isolate even the most well-connected healthy adult. Men particularly are inclined NOT to ask for help or admit to the loneliness. Give that man a call, stop in for a visit, buy him a beer. Support is as important to a man as it is to a woman.

2. Feed Him

• Yes, bring him a home-cooked meal if you can, but a favorite take-out meal or gift-certificate to a favorite eatery will be welcome as well.

3. Offer to do a Specific Chore.

• Better yet, just do it. Take his over-due books back to the library. Get his oil changed in his car. Offer to pick up the kids from after-school events. Ignore his insistence that "it isn't necessary."

4. Offer a Break.

• Come by and offer to stay in the house while he goes and does errands or takes a break, without worrying what will happen when he is gone.

5. Hire a Housekeeping Service

• Yes, he might want help cleaning the house but might feel embarrassed if someone he knows came in and saw the need. Professional help doesn't judge.

6. Help Celebrate the Holidays.

• Offer to do a holiday chore that he would like to do but, like everyone, finds difficult in the time-crunched life of a care-giver. Can you put up Christmas lights? Not every man hates to shop; offer to help find, wrap, or send gifts. Hang a fresh wreath on the door.

These are just some ideas to help you acknowledge the man who shoulders the care of his loved ones.
Would love to hear how you support and celebrate those who care.