This truth is most evident and often most painful when as seniors we are forced to prune our belongings to move into a smaller place. Simply changing your residence heightens the stress to our lives as documented by psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe in 1967. Possible complications of ill-health, loss of a loved one or moving to a new geographical region, and the task of weeding out belongings overwhelms.
But here are three strategies you or someone who is helping you can use that will help the process and may even bring some comfort. These steps can be approached one room, one cabinet or one residence at a time.
1. Clear out the obvious debris. In a garden it may be obvious what is dead or weedy but it usually requires knowledge of the garden. Ask someone who knows you to help you dispense with the old documents, clothes, magazines, dishes etc. that simply aren't bringing life anymore. Name the stuff as debris and throw it out. Put it in garbage bags or haul to the dumpster and don't look at it anymore.
Recognize the work required and feel proud when you accomplish this step.
2. Choose the non-negotiable item. You know, the one you would take if the house was on fire. Start with one, because no matter where you are moving, you can probably take at least one beautiful, meaningful item. Some people choose items like a Bible, a wedding photo or framed family portrait. Depending on where you are moving, you may be able to go room to room and pick one or two items from each. Assemble these items in a box or bag and label it. I would label mine "beautiful and still blooming". Stop and rest, recognize your life's valuable gifts and be grateful for this step.
3. Attack the middle ground. Attacking the middle ground is really step one and two; repeat. In this process you may determine to give things away, put things in storage or sell items which cannot move with you. However no matter how large or small this remaining middle ground is, you have a framework to continue the process and you (and the person helping you) can recognize the progress.Time-constraints impose their demands, as any season will, and often we are forced to do this pruning and weeding task faster than we desire. When this task is approached with this gardener's framework, we can have hope that we aren't just "throwing away all my stuff" as one client told me. We can look to see what new things emerge from a cleared ground.
When Dawn isn't writing or gardening, she helps Always Best Care clients lead active, hopeful lives in her role as Activity Coordinator.
