Honoring Valentinus

Pink handmade paper and handmade ornament

Ahem, it's almost upon us. February Fourteenth. Welcomed or reviled, shunned or embraced, this ancient holiday is rarely completely overlooked. (Woe to the young male pursuant if it is). How do you observe this upcoming, heart-adorned holiday? It probably depends on your age, your experience and your pocketbook.

Very few facts are known about Valentinus, the martyred saint (or saints) from the second (or third) century in Rome, whose name adorns this fractious holiday. 

Nonetheless, 18th Century Englishmen took this minor Christian holiday as excuse to send tokens of endearment, usually in the form of confections and flowers; to their beloved, or hope-to-be beloveds. Those supposedly staid and reserved Englishmen were given to ardent and sometimes flowery declarations of devotion. Those expressions of highly idealized romantic love influence many of our traditional customs of buying flowers, giving chocolates and sending mushy Valentine cards.

I enjoy all those traditions, but since Englishmen made up customs to suit their purposes, so can any of us, honoring the spirit of love and affection. Here are three I have observed and enjoyed with others.

Craft day

4th grader heart made of clay

Since kindergarten forward, people like to make and decorate hearts. The handmade lingers long with us, so whip out the paper and doilies, or fabric and lace, or clay and glaze, and make yourself some hearts to give to someone, anyone you love.

Day-After-Party

Don't want to buy in to the commercialism? Feeling just a tad resentful about all this emphasis on romance? Plan a day or two after-party. Buy all those chocolates the day after at half-off. Choose a theme decidedly not romantic, and invite someone you haven't seen lately. Hey, invite someone you barely know, or your neighbor you've been meaning to visit. One woman I know has a several years' running day-after-party. She's created her own tradition.

Acts of random, unexpected kindness

wrapped glass ornament with wire & beads

If there was ever a day you needed or wanted to practice random acts of kindness, now is the time to go-for-it! Buy a stranger a cup a coffee, or grab an extra load of laundry for a friend, or purposefully tell someone what you appreciate about them. If they blush, or protest, you can smile and say “Happy Valentine's Day”.