Four Ways to Fight Isolation

Loneliness and isolation are kissing cousins. We can feel lonely in the midst of a crowd because we don’t sense any connection. But living isolated engenders loneliness and feeds depression because you have lost your connections to the people and activities you once enjoyed. If you have struggled with long term illness or disability you have probably experienced both.

Humans are supremely social creatures who need physical, social and emotional connections to stay healthy. So how does one replace isolation with engagement and purpose?  While it takes serious intention to make necessary adaptations, it is possible to live with purpose and pleasure despite limitations. The following are ways I have seen people remain engaged in community. Let me know your ideas!

Plan to go out: Think about how to go out even for just an hour. Make a date with a friend or family member to accompany you. People are willing to assist, but don’t know what you need unless you tell them. Call ahead to see if there is a wheelchair ramp and then go to a farmer’s market, a festival or outdoor concert. Choose to go to your favorite donut shop, coffeehouse or church service. Yes, it’s more work and takes more planning to do these outings but they are worth it.

Open your home: If it is too difficult for you to go out, invite people over. Some resist this idea. You may not want to invite people in when you are not feeling your best, but if don’t you are inviting isolation and it’s resulting loneliness. Offer your home for meetings and gatherings. Host a lunch and ask everyone to bring a dish. Invite neighbors and friends over for coffee, a glass of wine or a card game. Sometimes people stay away because they are uncertain when or whether they are welcome. Create welcome.

Volunteer: Call any organization you wish to support or those that interest you to see how you can help. Volunteers greet people at a special event or pack socks for soldiers. Volunteers are needed to schedule people to give blood or follow up on fundraising commitments. Some of these activities can be done from home. When you give back, you don’t feel alone and you will meet like-minded people.

Use technology wisely: FaceBook and Email will not replace personal interaction but they can help you stay in touch with long-distance loved ones. Also there are many on-line support groups that can help you feel less alone with a chronic illness. Use them wisely; finger to keyboard will not replace a smile, a hug, a chat.